What Can We Do to Overcome Abuse

Hello Online Family and Friends,

We can overcome any thing we put our minds to, especially domestic violence and abuse.  Determination.  I did!  Now I am safe, I have joy and happiness.  I have forgiven my abusers and I have forgiven my seIf. I lived with my abuser for 15 years.  Because I moved too fast and lacked knowledge and support I spent another seven years in an abusive relationship. I cannot promise the road to overcoming abuse will be easy or the process time will be short but with support, knowledge and determination you can do it too.  What I can promise, is that you can do it.  We have to learn to love and trust ourselves again.  At a point in our lives we lost the love and trust,  and in turn, opened the door to the abuse.  Please understand that you did not deserve it.  People that abuse others learned that by watching others that abused.  They saw it as a way of control.  Somebody hurt them, so they hurt others.  If it never got dealt with, then the cycle of abuse continues.  Only when the cycle of abuse is broken, healing comes.  We thought we were in love and didn’t know the warning signs of abuse.  Once you realize you are in an abusive relationship seek help and support to plan and make a way of escape for you and your children.  Knowledge is power!   Counseling will help with you to  build and rebuild relationships.  The first step is to admit you are loved by God.  God is the true Healer.  You are Awesome, amazing and worth it and in control of your life.   We are the only one that can make decisions for ourselves and our children.  We have the power to keep ourselves and children safe and not worry about the next time. Live in a healthy environment because we know that we deserve the best.  God only wants the best for his Children and He will never leave or forsake us.  God’s word is the truth and we can depend on Him.  When you are free from your abuser, you will begin to learn how to live without them.  You begin to start your life anew.  Start walking, sleeping and eating the right way.  Do things that you use to do, that made you happy, like reading, writing, participating in or watching sporting events, just to name a few.  Now that you know, that you know, pass it on to others in need. The lesson is to keep control and watch out and know the warning signs to avoid. You will have a great relationship when the time is right.  And remember to pass love and encouragement on to someone else.

All the best,

Denise Hardnett

“Love Doesn’t Have To Hurt”

Deciding to Leave Your Abuser

Deciding to leave your abuser.  If you are hoping, and praying your abuser will change?

It good to pray.  They have to let God change them.  You can’t change them.  Real change comes from the person. The abuse will happen again, if they don’t seek counseling from a domestic violence counselor.  Create a support system of trusted family and friends.  There is also agencies in your area.

Things to do.  Please keep  private from your abuser.  Keep a journal to document the abuse.  Collect important papers and clothing in a safe place.  Extra set of keys.  Notify your job, school or daycare.

Abusers have deep rooted emotional and probably psychological problems.  It takes time to change.    The hardest part is leaving and you worry about what will happen once you leave.  Love Doesn’t have to Hurt.

Signs that your abuser is not changing:

1. He minimizes that abuse

2. He tells you if you wouldn’t have done this or that then it wouldn’t happen

3. You have to push them to seek counseling

4.  If you leave, they will commit suicide or kill you.

5.  He pressures you

6. Know your abuser

7. Be safe by making up a code to use in a time of emergency

8.  Identify safe places in the home

9. Make an escape plan

Be safe and seek help

All the best,

Denise

Thanks for reading and leave comment.

Faith from the Inside Out

Hi Family and Friends,

“Faith from the Inside Out” is a screenplay 2nd part of my book “Love Doesn’t have to Hurt”   With prayer I am developing and writing for families living with or surviving domestic violence.   “Faith from the Inside Out” purpose is to inspire,  change lives for a better you.  It’s about a series of life challenges designed for families, especially children.  It will be written,  Illustrated and easy to understand teaching about Faith, Love and Forgiveness.  It will satisfy curiosity and  promote growth  shown with vivid colors, drawing, coloring and reading.  Through the process learning without Faith ~ to ~ learning with Faith, Love and Forgiveness how it will work in your life.  Please look out for my new book series, that I have the pleasure and opportunity to share with you.  Please checkout this link from my Pastor Creflo Dollar

http://www.worldchangers.org/Monthly-ObeyFaith.aspx

the best,

Denise