What Are We Showing Our Chilldren

TyKaihugHi family and friends,

My name is Denise and I am speaking from my own experiences. I grew up with both of my parents. My mom was very passive and submissive to my dad. My mom was a loving mom not only to her children, but other people too. In turn, my dad was very abusive and abused alcohol. Growing up witnessing domestic violence in the home hurt very much. It affected the whole family negatively. I was afraid most of the time, because I did not know why or when my dad was going to be abusive. I also learned not to trust a lot of people. I learned to be on guard, to protect myself. I was powerless to change the abuse we experienced. Because I didn’t know how to. As I got older I prayed a lot. In school, I was withdrawn and not involved in a lot of activities. I had a lot of nightmares. Just sharing some of the things I went through. MY whole life consisted of home, school and church. Did I tell, what was going on with me? NO. As I got older, I continued to be passive and lacked confidence. So, I am asking…What are you showing are children?

Just think a minute. We are role models to our family, friends and others, they are looking at us. Growing up I saw or heard my daddy yelling and used bad words. I saw and felt emotional and physical abuse, as a child, I thought it was okay, a normal way of life. After going through sexual, emotional and domestic violence myself. Over time, I learned better and I want to share with others, mainly children, that it’s not okay to hurt others. Love doesn’t have to hurt. You learn to forgive and heal from domestic violence. And the healing process does take time.

If you want your children and others to do positive things, we have to show or teach them positive things. Talking to others with respect. And teaching problem-solving when you have disagreements. Use loving words not fight with words or hit with your hands.

If you want responsible children, we have to show and teach our children how to be responsible. How to make money, then save a portion, give a portion to the church and share a portion with someone in need.

If you want trustworthy children, we have to show and teach our children how to be trustworthy. By telling the truth and showing loyalty and have values.

It is so very important to teach our children the way they should go. We are blessed with beautiful babies to love, cherish, teach, disciple, and show the Love of Jesus.

Our children are the next generation. The future president, lawyer, dentist, preacher, with endless possibilities. Let’s do our very best to make sure our children do the best and get the best by teaching and showing them the Love of Jesus. We all need to pattern our life after Jesus, to be our very best.

Children do what they see you do. Please remember domestic violence is not the answer to a problem, but the problem. Once we love and respect ourself, we can love and respect others. It always start with us and at home.

God bless you,


Thank you for visiting and please leave a message, a thought or a quote.

The Keys to Empowerment ~ end domestic violence

Hi Everyone,

It is very important that we make a difference.  And that difference is showing love. What Legacy will you leave for others to follow?

Speaking from experience, I learned being positive in everything you do and say will promote Empowerment for healthy life.  If that mean forgive my abuser then I forgive.
Remembering Love doesn’t have to hurt.  And I think my abuser is hurting and he took it out on the person closest to him.

What’s in a man’s heart, so is he, which I find this statement to be true. Whatever is going on in the inside of you will come out or show on the outside. What difference are you making in the lives of others?  What Legacy are you leaving or setting for others to follow?

The Keys to Empowerment:Forgiving your abuser

  • Think positive
  • Surround yourself with positive people
  • Have a forgiving heart
  • Make a difference
  • Give your money, time, and resources to others.
  • Learn and teach a life skill, like sewing, difference language, tutoring
  • Knowing when to be quiet
  • Listen to others
  • Stop judging
  • If you wasn’t an eyewitness then don’t share it or tell others
  • Let everything you do and say line up with God.
Thank you for reading, God bless you and keep smiling

Happy New Year! New Beginnings

We made it!

Let’s go into the New Year with a renewed Mind.  Its all about forgiveness.  Please ask God to help you forgive your abuser, so you will be free to feel love, have peace and happiness.

If you can talk about a painful experience that you had and not feel anger, then you have been healed through God’s Grace and Mercy.

Read Genesis 32:31, 32

I am writing a book, Love Doesn’t have to Hurt.  I promise to keep you posted.

Happy New Year!

Healthy Relationships ~ Love Doesn’t Hurt

Hi Family,  As we go into a new year, lets focus on healthy relationships.  We don’t know why people do what they do?  Or why we feel a certain way or words that we express.  We don’t know their story, situation in their life without them telling us!  We all react according to our life.  God is Love, the true Healer.  Love Doesn’t Hurt

So if someone say they love you and they’re hitting, punching and kicking you, than that’s not love.

Happy Birthday Jesus

Jesus is the reason for the holiday season.  Please remember Jesus!  Family and friends are forever.  If you know a family or child that need your help, please help.  Life is too hard to live alone.

The Reason ~ Love Doesn’t have to Hurt

Hi Family,

Have you ever thought about all the people that touch your life?

Think about all the people that touch your life, whether great or small all is important.
Think about the service workers, staff, family and friends that care about you and want to help. If you need help its available.

All the people that paved the way for us.

Love Doesn’t Hurt “together we can end domestic violence.”

Thinking of You

Thinking of You

Thinking of you is like a cool breeze on a Summer day thanks for keeping me safe

Summer days warms the soul and makes you look forward to another day thanks to you I have another day

Another day promised by God

God is my everything and I thank God for sharing you with me

With Me and You there is true Love, Family, Friendship, and Warmth thinking of You.

Happy Birthday, Nicky and Ramon (twins)

Happy Father’s Day

Happy Father’s Day, daddy.  Happy Father’s Day to all the fathers

God made daddy to take care of his family

God made daddy strong to protect the family.

God made daddy to guide the family.

But we have to pray for daddy because we don’t know what our daddies been through.

Rest in peace,


Your Thoughts

Hi Family,

The tongue is very powerful that’s why we must think before we speak.  Most importantly, we must also think before we react.  In God’s word we must speak things as though they were.  Ours Words are powerful.  People lose their friends, family, relationships are broken, jobs loss all over words.  Please be careful what you say and do.

If you are thinking wrong, your actions will be wrong.  If you’re thinking correct, your actions will be correct.  Correct thinking line up with the Word of God.

If we want things to change in our life, we must act like it and believe in it.  The change will come, just be patience and have faith.

I challenge you to believe and let the Lord work in your life.  Keep a diary, write down the things that you pray about and ask God for.  Keep a diary, have faith and watch God work.

Please read this article, you will not be disappointed.

This is a powerful article “Your Thoughts Determine Your Life.”

What you Sow is what you will Reap

Hi Family,

“Giving leaves an imprint that endures for forever” – African Proverb

Love doesn’t hurt a book to empower to end domestic violence. Think about it, this is a true statement.  “What you Sow is what you will Reap”  If you give love, you get love back.  If you don’t give, you will not get anything back.

Let’s be the example for our children, family, friends and people we don’t even know.  It is so important to think before we react about things.  Sometimes once it’s done, or said its done.  Feelings change.  You forgive that person but the relationship  will never be like it once was.

Let’s give and give in any way that you can.   If you have money or not, please give something.  Help make someone’s life better.  Be blessed to be a blessing.  If you know someone that is  hurting, or lonely, need of clothing, food, let’s help.  We all can think of some kind of way or ways to help someone else.  It may be reading a book or teaching someone to read and  write.  Teaching a child or adult a skill.  Make a meal or give a card.  Made gifts are always very special and thoughtful.  What you sow is what you will Reap.  If you want to get, receive thats what you have to give out.

Have a wonderful day.  Talk soon.